At age 86, while still of sound mind, my mother called me from NY State to come home and help her take care of all her final arrangements. She was a strong woman, highly opinionated and one who always knew what she wanted. The call came as no surprise, perhaps at a slightly inconvenient time. Then again maybe there is perfect time to handle these kinds of things. The idea of driving eight hours to plan your mother’s funeral was not exactly and event I was looking forward to.

When I got to her apartment she had everything written down for me to follow to the letter. The next day I took her list to the funeral home that she requested and I set up a meeting with one of the owners. It was a strange feeling that day. We used to live directly across the street when I was in Jr. High School. As a newspaper delivery boy the funeral home was on my route and they always gave me a big tip for the holidays.

My mother did not want a showing, she did not want to spend anymore than required by law for a burial vault or casket. This was to be the ultimate no frills funeral.

I had no idea how upset all this would make the funeral director. He tried to humiliate me into upgrading all of her requests. He came just short of calling me a worthless no good money grubbing son for not having more respect for my mother. How could any loving son do such a terrible deed to his own mother? I won’t bore you with all the sales ploys used to change my mind.

Interesting, but when my dad suddenly passed away, I had to make all these decisions in 24 hours or less in midst of grief and a overwhelming sense of loss. To say that I was of no sound mind to make these decisions was an understatement. I am sure the funeral director put the same guilt trip on me as I responded to all of his suggestions to do the “right things” and give my dad a burial that everyone would respect.

In retrospect, having been through both situations regarding the handling of final arrangements I have to lean heavily on the side of pre-planning in the cool of the day with a sound mind vs. making critical decision is the face of monumental grief I have a less than favorable opinion of the funeral directors who shamefully prey on the emotions of people in distress. Unfortunately the funeral industry is no different than most other sales organizations in that they will use any advantage they can to hawk their wares.

I am sure there are many well meaning funeral directors and their sale organizations out there that do not use these techniques. Based on my personal experience, I would not be surprised to learn that my experience was not that unusual. I would love to hear what others would have to share regarding their own experiences in similar situations.

To end the story my mother died approximately a year later. Her instructions were followed to the letter and I am at peace that her final wishes were carried out the way she wanted them to be rather than what a funeral director tried to foist on the family to make an extra buck.

Retirement Planning For Dummies: What You Forgot To Include In Your Retirement Plans

By Dr. Cynthia Barnett

Everyone knows that the best way to plan for your retirement is to make sure you have a 401K plan or something similar, so you can save enough money to live on in your golden years. Or is it? If you’ve only planned for your financial security, you have missed a huge and important step in your retirement planning.

Consider this: the average retirement age for Americans is 57.5, and life expectancy is 85 or older. This means the average retirement lasts 30 years or more. Sitting around and doing nothing might be relaxing for a while, but do you really want to spend 30 years gathering dust?

The most important thing you can do for your retirement planning doesn’t involve the financial aspect. Of course you need to make sure you’ll have enough money set aside to maintain your lifestyle, but beyond that, you have to fulfill your non-material needs. How are you going to spend your time? How will you remain satisfied and purpose-driven? The answers to these questions are the aspects too many people neglect to include in their retirement planning.

Your first step should be to determine these answers. There are a number of ways you can do this. Here are some tips on discovering what you really want out of your golden years and planning for more than just financial security:

* List everything that you have always wanted to do, but had to put on a back burner because you didn’t have the time. Is there a place you long to visit? A hobby you’ve wanted to pick up? An organization you’ve been thinking about joining?

* Don’t rule anything out because you think you’ll be “too old” for it. They say you’re only as old as you feel – and if you need proof, just look at how many people in their sixties and even seventies are sky diving, bungee jumping, and rock climbing!

* Consider working when you retire. It’s not as bizarre as it sounds – perhaps there is a place you’ve always wanted to work, but couldn’t make a career out of it because it didn’t pay enough. Retirement is the time to try it out and see what you’ve been missing.

* Think of your retirement as a beginning, rather than an ending. Once you leave the “real” workforce, you can start a whole new life of realizing your dreams.

When you decide on the non-financial course of your retirement, it’s a good idea to keep track of your vision. You may want to start a retirement journal and write down your goals. There are many things you can do now to have everything in place for your re-fired life! Find out what it’s going to take to accomplish your goals, and put down as much of the groundwork as possible between now and retirement time.

Also, keep in mind that it’s never too early -–or too late-– to start laying the foundation for your retirement planning. Once you’ve determined your vision for an ideal retirement that includes the realization of your dreams, you can start taking steps to achieve that vision no matter where you are in life.

About the Author: Dr. Cynthia Barnett is a Re-Firement Lifestyle Coach and the author of Prime Time Makeover: How to Make the Rest of Your Life the Best of Your Life. Visit her online at http://www.primetimemakeover.com for a free newsletter, special report, and to purchase the book.

Source: www.isnare.com

Permanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=236963&ca=Finances

Do You have Enough Money to Retire?

Algebra.Com:

This does not happen by magically wishing for it or dreaming it into reality. It takes detailed planning.

This may help. You can Google “Retirement Calculator,” find one you like and start to play with the numbers.

Here is one I found you can use:

http://www.banksite.com/calc/retire

Rule of thumb: The sooner you plan for retirement the better. If you wait at least give your self ten good years of earnings and investments with the help of a solid financial planner to get you ready to retire on your terms.

Age Discrimination is Alive and Well

I have talked to many seniors who lost their jobs late in their career. It’s not fun at any age. When you over 50, send your resume out and see how many employers are willing to even talk to you let alone offer you a job at the salary and benefit level that you had in your last job.

Age discrimination is very hard to prove. It is subjective and employers can simply say they found someone more qualified. How to fight that?

Here is my simple advice. If you really want to avoid this demoralizing experience, find a way to develop a second source of income working for yourself. Work to eventually replace your primary jonb with your second job. Then when you are let go or are forced to leave a good job you have a hobby or second career you now spend full time on and not worry about someone telling you are no longer qualified to do what they are willing to give to someone 20 years younger with none to little experience.

It’s a sad fact but age discrimination in real. I have experienced it and talked to enough seniors to know that what I am telling you is fact. Start today figuring a way to take care of your family if and when you get the pink silip in your peak years so the company can give you job to a younger person for half what they are paying you.

My grandfather went through the stock market crash of 1929 and would put me on his lap as a young boy and tell me about people with money buying things for pennies on the dollar. I am not sure why that stuck in my mind but it did.

I don’t believe we are headed for another great depression, (let’s hope not) but the real estate market is definitely struggling at the moment due to the mortgage crisis, the falling value of the dollar, gas prices going out the roof and general uncertainty in the world in general.

The good news is that if you have money and/or good credit, this is a fabulous times to buy real estate. There are far more properties for sale then buyers so prices come down in a buyer’s market. I realize that what this means is that many people will profit from the misery of others but that’s life when times slow down and get tough. There is always someone waiting to take advantage. As they say, buy low and sell high.

It was not too long ago when there were more buyers then sellers. That drove prices up and many that bought in early made a profit. That’s how the market works. Nothing lasts forever and the down market we are in today will once again recover. Those that bought in low now will make a lot of money when the market turns back around.

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I am not a real estate expert so I won’t pretend to know if the market has hit bottom yet or not.
Timing the market is hard to do. However, my sense is that there are great buys to be had now even if the market continues to dip because once it comes back it will most likely exceed the past higher prices. Buy now and then be patient. Time will tell if that is a good decision or not.